How do we measure up?

It's been a few weeks since I wrote my last blog... My Father in-law took ill last spring, and took a turn for the worse a few weeks ago. In mid-December he was rushed to a hospital, then a hospice in Ottawa and then moved to another hospice in Cornwall. A week ago he passed away.

This has been quite a difficult time on my wife. She is emotional at the best of times and her Father passing added to the stress she always feels around Christmas. I do not envy her position right now. And while I can be supportive and talk or listen — depending on the situation - I cannot stand in her shoes.

I won't get into the details of their relationship, but certain conversations we've had over the past few weeks led me into thinking deeply about success and how people view it in so many ways.

I think many people feel success is financial. If they have saved a certain amount of money, if they have a certain amount of funds invested both for future purchases and retirement, perhaps they feel they have been successful. If they have a high-paying or rewarding career, perhaps this is how they would measure success.

Some people measure their success in life, by substituting false ideals as morality. Such things as the environmental movement and other social and socialist ideals - being 'green' and saving the planet has become a religion instead of an idea. While some people applaud all the environmentalists as great people, I actually find most of the extreme ones I've met as lacking in moral fibre in all areas but the environment.

I have often wondered about how I would claim success in life. Certainly, if financial success is the only criteria being used, I will be falling short. If career is the measuring stick, then I'd be happy - but my chosen profession is certainly not a career that many people would look up to.

But I really think success in life is something that has to be looked at and broken down into many different aspects.

When I look at my wife for example -I feel she has been an immense success in her life. She has raised 4 boys and taken care of a home all while I was at work. She has helped to raise her grand-daughter for the past 3 years and taken care of her brother (he's a topic I refuse to discuss) for about 20 years. She was and is a people person.

I think, of all the professions in this world, being a mother, raising a family, and taking care of a home should be the highest and most respected of all. Directly influencing, nurturing and guiding young minds and souls cannot be equalled. She is a teacher, guidance counsellor, priest, nurse, doctor, seamstress, chef, cleaner, banker, and much more.

On top of all these things, she has found to time to volunteer for several associations, both sports and church related and still finding the time to play softball in the summer and bowling in the winter. These things are over and above some of the paying jobs she's held.

Is she a success? She doesn't think so, but she is using a yard-stick based on other peoples ideals, not her own. I truly feel I can never live up to her level of success.

I really think this can all be summed up by these simple questions: Have you made the world a better place to live while your on it? Will the world and those whose lives you affect be better off because of you? Have we done all we can to make those lives around us better?

With all the hustle and bustle of Christmas, the shopping, the parties, the work and social gatherings, I think we all need to take a small step back, look in the mirror and ask ourselves those questions. Hopefully we all find the answers we are looking for, but if not, there is time to change the things we don't like when we view our moral and spiritual reflections.

Merry Christmas everyone!